


Happy

by Laura_VG



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:13:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22577596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laura_VG/pseuds/Laura_VG
Summary: This basically just Maryse contemplating her life and what it has become ever since she was deruned. Either way, enjoy!!
Relationships: Luke Garroway/Maryse Lightwood
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	Happy

Maryse couldn’t remember the last time she felt like this.   
She stood in front of her mirror, looking at her reflection. The scars on running all over her arms and legs, all former runes embedded into her skin. She could still name every single one of them, the knowledge imprinted into her brain.   
Looking at them now, she felt a familiar twinge of sadness, accompanied with a growing sense of acceptance. With every day that past she noticed it became easier, seeing her scars. When she’d just been deruned, her scars just reminded her of everything she’d lost. They reminded her of her mistakes, the people she’d hurt. But the more she grew comfortable with her mundane life, the more she learned to accept her scars, her mistakes. Her children had been a big part of that, and so had Luke.  
Her and Lucian had always been friends, ever since they were kids. They’d trained together, went to school together. He’d been her first crush.   
She’d never admitted it to anyone, least of all him, but he had always been there. He was the only one to understand what it was like to be discriminated because of your last name. They’d both come from families that had very little. They both worked so hard to fight against the prejudices that came with their family name and they had both joined Valentine’s Circle.   
At the time though, she was already dating Robert, engaged to be married and they’d grown apart. And Lucian became best friends with Jocelyn and Valentine.   
When he’d been exiled, she wanted to go look for him. She didn’t know why, perhaps just to offer some comfort, or to apologize for all that she’d done to him over the years. Apologize for teasing him every chance that she got, or perhaps for moving on. But she’d had Alec to look after and if Valentine ever found out that she’d left to go find him, who knows what he would have done. So she didn’t.   
When she’d finally found out what had really happened that night, that Valentine had left him to be killed, something within her just broke. But she couldn’t exactly defy Valentine, so she stayed silent and loyal to him, just like Robert did.   
When she’d finally seen him again for the first time in years, her heart had skipped a beat. He hadn’t changed. He still had those dark eyes that made her feel like he could look through her soul and see all the hurt she had caused. Perhaps he could.   
She could practically smell the hostility bouncing off of him back then. It had hurt a little, but she’d mastered the skill of concealing her emotions over the years, and she’d never let it show. She had thought about it a little afterwards, when she was alone, but she’d pushed the thought away pretty fast.   
When she found out that the Clave was investigating her again, punishing her for her crimes against the Accords so many years ago, she realised she had a lot to make up for. And she realised that that moment had been her only chance to do so. The relationship she had with her children had been nearly non-existent at that point, but she was glad she’d put in the effort to save it. Her heart filled with joy every time she saw Alec smile, or whenever Isabelle hugged her goodbye after dinner. Her children were something so precious and she often thanked whatever God or Angel out there for saving whatever had been left.   
Her relationship with Luke had been somewhat a surprise. Even though the feelings she’d had for him had never really left, just locked up tightly, she’d never dreamed of being able to hug him whenever she wanted. Of holding hands with him, or kissing him.  
She’d never imagined that helping him find Clary would lead to them kissing in what would become her shop. She hadn’t anticipated the feelings that came with that kiss. Everything that she had been supressing for so long, just came out in that moment and she was glad that she had to go meet her children. It stopped her from taking things too fast, from rushing into this growing relationship of theirs.   
Shadowhunters believed that there was only one person you’re destined to be with, Maryse didn’t think that was true. If that were the case, she would’ve stayed with Robert because her crush on Lucian had never really had the chance to grow into love. She’d cared about him, there was no mistaking that, but she wasn’t sure that she had loved him when she was younger. And she knew that at some point in her life she had loved Robert, even if that love died a little bit later.   
And she knew for a fact that Luke had been in love with Jocelyn, had been for a long time. For him to move on and be happy again, would be impossible if she believed what all Shadowhunters believed. So she simply couldn’t.  
Taking a deep breath, Maryse moved away from the mirror. She’d spent way too much time standing there and contemplating about her past life. She had a date to get to.  
She moved towards the bed and grabbed her shoes, putting them on her feet with practised ease. The action was familiar, one she’d done a million times before. But somehow, now, it made her nervous. Perhaps it had something to do with Lucian.  
A smile made its way on her face, and she sighed she stood up, grabbing her purse and walking out of her room.   
“What are you smiling about?” The question came suddenly and it shook Maryse out of her reverie.   
Maryse grinned and made her way towards the man standing in the living room. She moved to grab his hand and Luke’s fingers wrapped around her hand like they had always belonged there.   
“Nothing”, she whispered, her grin turning into a gentle smile. She squeezed his hand and he smiled back at her.   
“I’m just happy.”


End file.
